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  • SharkyForums.Com - Print: On the lighter side

    On the lighter side
    By CajnDave December 14, 2000, 02:59 PM

    What really happened to those Peanuts characters when they grew up?
    Charlie Brown: Operates Good Grief Counseling Inc., which specializes in manic-depressives and people who are just having a bad day. Moonlights as a pitching coach at high school and college levels. Married to Marcie. They have a round-headed son who wears glasses.

    Linus: Developer of Security Blanket Software, which is a hot item on the New York Stock Exchange. Worth millions but is actively involved in charitable causes, including the Great Pumpkin 5K Fun Run every Halloween. Only man who makes Bill Gates nervous.

    Lucy: Serving her seventh term in Congress. On her third husband. Claims she hasn't thought about Schroeder in years, but the background music on her answering machine is Beethoven.

    Schroeder: After years on the classical performing circuit, he runs a piano bar in Carmel, Calif. Won't let anybody lean on his piano.

    Sally: Never quite got over being spurned by Linus. Has a cat named Sweet Baboo. Sells Mary Kay.

    Peppermint Patty: Women's athletic director at a Midwestern university. Her fashion credo: "Sandals go with everything."

    Snoopy: In dog years, he'll be 350. What do you think would've happened to him? Linus has created an endowment at Daisy Hill Puppy farm in Snoopy's memory.

    By CajnDave December 14, 2000, 03:01 PM

    Mom was cleaning the house when she found her son's
    hidden stash of S&M and sexual bondage magazines.

    Naturally, she was very upset and she didn't know
    what to do. So, she waited until her husband got
    home to discuss it with him.

    After she showed him the magazines, she asked him,
    "Well, what are you going to do about it?"

    "I don't know what to do." he told her. "I really
    don't think I should give him a spanking for this!"

    By CajnDave December 14, 2000, 03:09 PM

    UNIVERSITY ENTRANCE EXAM: Athletic Dept. VERSION

    Time Limit: 3 Weeks

    1. Foreign Language: What language is spoken in France?

    2. History: Give a dissertation on the ancient Babylonian Empire with
    particular reference to architecture, literature, law and social
    conditions
    -OR-
    Give the first name of Pierre Trudeau.

    3. Literature: Would you ask William Shakespeare to
    (a) build a bridge
    (b) sail the ocean
    (c) lead an army or
    (d) WRITE A PLAY

    4. Religion: What religion is the Pope? (circle only one)
    (a) Jewish
    (b) Catholic
    (c) Hindu
    (d) Polish
    (e) Agnostic

    5. Metric Conversion: How many feet equal 0.0 meters?

    6. Physics: What time is it when the big hand is on the 12 and the
    little hand is on the 5?

    7. Religion: How many commandments were Moses given? (approximately)

    8. Geography: What are people in America's far north called?
    (a) Westerners
    (b) Southerners
    (c) Northerners

    9. American History: Spell Bush, Carter, and Clinton.

    10. European History: Six kings of England have been called George, the
    last one being George the Sixth. Name the previous five.

    11. Natural Science: Where does rain come from?
    (a) Macy's
    (b) a 7-11
    (c) Canada
    (d) the sky

    12. Advanced Physics: Can you explain Einstein's Theory of Relativity?
    (a) yes
    (b) no

    13. Philosophy: What are coat hangers used for?

    14. Political Science: The Star Spangled Banner is the National Anthem
    for what country?

    15. Physics: Explain Le Chateliers Principle of Dynamic Equilibrium
    -OR-
    spell your name in BLOCK LETTERS.

    16. Architecture: Where is the basement in a three-story building
    located?

    17. Agricultural Science: Which part of America produces the most
    oranges?
    (a) New York
    (b) Florida
    (c) Canada
    (d) Wisconsin

    18. Advanced math: If you have three apples, how many apples do you
    have?

    19. Communications: What does NBC (National Broadcasting Corporation)
    stand for?

    IMPORTANT! You must answer three or more questions correctly to qualify.

    By Phoenix December 14, 2000, 08:44 PM

    quote:Originally posted by CajnDave:
    12. Advanced Physics: Can you explain Einstein's Theory of Relativity?
    (a) yes
    (b) no

    Is that Special Relativity or General Relativity

    By CajnDave December 14, 2000, 08:57 PM

    quote:Originally posted by Phoenix:
    Is that Special Relativity or General Relativity

    Not sure I think it something to with the wing velocity of a sparrow.

    By Phoenix December 14, 2000, 09:08 PM

    quote:Originally posted by CajnDave:
    Not sure I think it something to with the wing velocity of a sparrow.


    lol

    By BoogyMan December 15, 2000, 07:12 AM

    quote:Originally posted by CajnDave:
    Not sure I think it something to with the wing velocity of a sparrow.


    LMAO!

    By shawnmos December 15, 2000, 06:52 PM

    LOL!!
    quote:Originally posted by CajnDave:
    Not sure I think it something to with the wing velocity of a sparrow.

    By Fuzzball December 15, 2000, 08:54 PM

    LMAO!

    By Storm897 December 15, 2000, 09:17 PM

    quote:Originally posted by CajnDave:
    Not sure I think it something to with the wing velocity of a sparrow.

    that entrance exam was pretty funny. LOL.


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